Kalistani Major History

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The Republic Editorial
"Dear Queen of Lourenne:  F--k you."Al-Khali responds to Charges of deterioration from Lourenne
Kaliburg, Ananto
February 3, 4430

Dear Editor of The Kalistani Republic

Recently, the Lourenne Queen called us the most Drug Addicted Nation in Terra.

First, we are happy to read that they have banned the use of all recreational drugs other than Weed.  That's fine.  ODEN informs me that they make a lot of money selling Lourennaise Potheads weed, and I am convinced that Kalistani herb is better than anything the Lourennaise can scratch out of their meager sandy-ass "soil" anyway.

Second of all, to the Queen, I say, "F--k you."  I think all of Kalistan joins me in that position, but I want to state emphatically, that's MY position.  It is always better to live under an elected President than an inbred monarch.  Why not give your people the freedom to select their own leaders?  You call us the most drug addicted nation in Terra, but we assure you this is not true.  Because when drugs are legal, addiction is treated like a medical issue, rather than a moral one.  The most drug-addicted nations in Terra are ones where use is arbitrarily outlawed by a malicious and moralizing Government of elitist do-gooders who think they know better how to govern the choices of people than the people themselves do.  That is the essence of fascism, Comrade, and you're tits deep in it.

So, just remember that, you fascist.  People in Kalistan may use drugs, but they use them freely and legally, while people in Lourenne also use drugs, but your idiotic law makes them criminals, and denies them services to help them when they get into trouble.  I suppose you'd rather thrown people in your dungeons than help them, but hey, that's on you, you imperialist puppet usurper.

What am I saying?  The whole country is an capitalist dungeon...  I guess drug prohibition is the precisely correct policy for your people after all.

Sincerely,
Abdulaziz al-Khali
A Kalistani